KG's Hideaway

10-1-05 9:55pm

Well, I actually stayed home today from Ryan's second game and now I regret it. She played an early afternoon game with her highschool team that is a tournament over at Nolan Catholic School and then she was supposed to go and play at least one game with DFW Elite, who is in an NCAA sanctioned tournament at SMU. Craig just called me a few minutes ago to tell me about all the college coaches that were there and once again Jody Conrad walked into the gym and sat down to watch the game that Ryan was playing in. Who knows who she was there to see, but I'll take it regardless.
Her first game today she did very well, and was second highest scorer. She misses 3 of her free throws though, and that can't happen in the season. They've got 3 more weeks of volleyball before she can actually start working out with the school basketball team, and I'm really looking forward to that.

Well, the saga continues with my family. Austin is in town this weekend and my mother decided that she would follow him around Crowley, presumably to "talk" to him. He had to make four quick turns to lose her and after he did, he called me. Craig called my parents house and left a message asking them to please not do that. My dad called Craig and told him not to ever call, leave a message, send an email or letter or ever step foot on their property. That pretty much pissed me off so I picked up the phone to call, and when my mother answered I asked for my Dad. She actually told me that I couldn't talk to him. Instead of arguing, which is what I would normally do, I just said "ok" and hung up.

Not long after we got home from Ryan's first game, my home phone rang and my mother said, "You obviously have something you need to say to me.... so what is it?" I just kind of sat there for a second and then I just told her that I had nothing to say. I've gotten it all out with the exception of what has happened to Craig and that she needed to take ownership of that. She told me in no uncertain terms that she would NOT take ownership of anything regarding Craig. I told her then that I guess we DO need to talk, at which point she told me to come over, but by myself. I was there less than 3 minutes later and strangely enough she wasn't there. I walked in and my dad came in from the back of the house and told me to go out on the porch. So he and I were out there for maybe 4 or 5 minutes before mom got back (I think she went to buy a pack of smokes... blech) and he asked me what was wrong. I told him I thought the whole thing was pointless because I was willing to bet that my mother would NOT be honest. About that time, she walked out there and I could tell just from her posture that she was ready for a battle. Not a fight. An all out war.

So she told me to start talking. I took a deep breath and told Dad that I was only angry with the situation with Austin and the one with Craig. My mother said that she wouldn't take any blame for the situation with Craig. I just ignored her and told my dad that it is ridiculous that Craig is being treated that way all because he said that mom was lying. I then looked my mother right in the eyes and said, "You've sat at my house and lied to Dad on numerous occassions for 5 years." She looked puzzled and said, "Bullshit. What the fuck have I lied about?" (Yes, my mother said FUCK) I decided right then and there to unload the biggest secret about my mother that I had. Craig knows it. My brother knows it and my sister knows it. It's nothing major, but she still lied and I had proof, and even told him where to find the proof.

My mother flipped her fucking lid like I've never seen. She was screaming at me to get off her property or she'd call the cops. She called me every name under the sun, but I just ignored her and looked at my dad. I could tell by the look on his face that he knew I wasn't lying. Especially when I told him to call my brother if he doubted me. My mother lunged at me and tried to put both her hands around my neck but only succeeded in getting one on me, then when my dad pulled her away, she scratched my neck. She was screaming that she was going to call CPS, the police... anyone she could think of just to cause trouble for me. I just walked away saying, "You're fucking crazy!" She told me, and I quote, "You and your fucking family... including your fucking kids can all go to hell!" My dad told her to stop it but she was so far out of control that I don't think a bottle of xanax would calm her down.

My dad was looking at her with this look on his face that let me know he believed me. I had too many details to be lying OR wrong. She was still screaming, and grabbed my purse that was sitting on the floor the walked through the house to the garage so that she could throw it out on the driveway... wooooo. So then she came back in and resumed screaming that if I didn't leave she'd call the police. My dad said I should probably go, so I got up and went to the door. My mom was STILL screaming and lunged at me. My dad was between us but because I didn't move or dodge it, she got one hand around my neck and scratched me as my dad pulled her away. That pissed me off to no end, so I turned around to face her. I guess at that point I wanted her to hit me, though there is nothing on this planet that would allow me to hit my mom. I finally just left... but could still hear her screaming about what a bitch I am .. blah blah blah. Who cares?

So as I'm driving off I called my brother to tell him that I'd brought him into it. I'm not proud of that, but I did it and wanted to at least give him a heads up on it so he wouldn't get blindsided. He told me that he'd own up to dad about what he'd done, but he wouldn't tell dad about mom. I told him that I was sick of his double standards and had no respect at all for him. I said that my husband was basically excominicated from this family because he pointed out that my mother lied and my husband is having to pay the price for pointing that lie out. All because my mother isn't honest. And that's bullshit. But ya know what? I haven't shed a tear. This time I dealt with the stress much better than before. I didn't jump in there looking for a fight but by the same token, I certainly knew my revelation would cause a stink. I'm not a supporter of people who try to interfere in other people's marriage, but I felt that my husband's intergrity was impugned and it was done so in order that she didn't have to take responsibility for the lies she told.

I have no idea where the peices will fall, but I won't regret my words. My husband is all about personal integrity and is the man whose sense of right and wrong will often force him to go back to a store and pay for for something if he looks at the receipt and sees that he didn't get charged for something. He doesn't lie. He doesn't cheat. And he doesn't steal. Top that off with the fact that he is a Mason and that should tell you all that you need to know about my husband. Ironically, my dad is the exact same way (and also a Mason). His only weak spot is my mom and I hate it that I was the one to offer up proof that his trust in her was misplaced... I really hate that. kdgr